Since OJ is taking an unscheduled break from finding Ron and Nicole's killer, Rusty "Trombone" Hardin is filling The Fugitive void and launching his own investigation into Clemens' use or nonuse of performance-enhancing substances.
Hmm, who to trust? Mitchell was an independent investigator who did not have any axe to grind or any reason to punish any one player. Rusty Hardin represents a long-suspected now-accused baseball player who experienced an incredible renaissance right around the time steroids peaked in baseball. I'm sure Rusty will present all of the evidence he uncovers, even if it violates his ethical duty to always do right by his client.
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blablahblblhblah Exhibit A: Clemens has always been a bit of a schlub.In other news, Dick Cheney has been assigned to investigate accusations of wrongdoing by Halliburton. Oliver North has announced that he will get to the bottom of Iran-Contra. The CIA, in conjunction with the Cuban government, is launching an independent probe into the assassination of John F. Kennedy. (Last one...) Lindsay Lohan has been named the new drug czar and will personally oversee counter-drug activities in Colombia.
I think I'll wait for the only time-tested method of obtaining accurate information about any story: the New York Times bestseller written by two journalists with income in the mid-$20K range who luck into a tell-all source.
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